I get the ickies to when faced with social events that are baby/young child centered.  In the begining when my first husband and I were newly married it did not bother me to attend my friends showers and birthday celebrations for their babies.  But after discovering my husband's affair and his mistresses resulting pregnancy, I divorced him and moved on.  I did move on I met someone wonderful who has been my rock for years, however the only thing my uterus has spawned is fibroids.  Attendinding these baby orieted social affairs has gotten difficult, to the point where I don't attend.  My best friend who seems like she can fall pregers just by looking at a guy chalks it up to me being "stingy with the cash" as my reasoning for not attending her birthday bashes for her two kids.  I told her it's not that it is to painful to watch a room full of todlers and babies when you know that you can't have a baby. 

My long time boyfriend and I married this past winter and the infertility still remains.  We are looking into weather or not we should spend our savings(when we accrue enough cash) on Serogate service or going thru the IVF.  My Dh who i addore says he wants to see me blissfuly pregnant morning sickness and moodswings he's willing to take it on. However, he also is aware that if this is not meant to be for us with me carrying a baby then Serogacy might be an option?  however he just about died when he saw the fees for services and he was honest stating that there was no way he could pay for IVF plus the mother's fees.  I understand where he is comming from he works so hard and he is considering taking an extra job on the weekends to build a fund for the IVF therapy and adding on other fees will break us.  I wish I had a magic ball and could see what the heavens hold for DH and i in respects to our family because the uncertanty is killing me on the inside and I feel guilt at him having to go out to find more work on top of the full time job he allready holds.  Does anyone feel guilty at the cost of high finances their spouses are going thru to try to build their families? and if so how do you balance out the guilt?