My agency provided this great list of things to do that I thought I'd share:

BEFORE THE DUE DATE:

1. Make arrangements with your couple regarding how you are to notify them when labor begins. Many couples carry a beeper so that they are not tied to their telephones and fearful of missing your call.

2. We encourage you to visit the hospital and take a tour (maybe with your couple) before the birth. Though you have had hospital experience prior to this birth, it may be an advantage to visit the hospital so that you feel more comfortable in this new setting.

3. Regarding your hospital stay, you must decide where you would like to stay after the delivery. Our preference is that you consider trying to reserve a private room. Surrogates often feel more comfortable in a private room so as not to have to explain to their roommate the special circumstances of the birth. It also allows for more private time with your couple. You may need to check your insurance to see if this would be covered.

4. Decide what the role you want the couple to take during the delivery and make sure you are clear with them about this. i.e., who will be your support person, if they are wanted in or out of the delivery room, where you want them during this time (many surrogate mothers prefer to ask the father to stand behind their shoulders), and whether or not you even want ice chips!

WHEN THE CHILD IS BORN:

1. Upon arrival at the hospital, feel free to tell the hospital staff that you are a surrogate mother. This decision is left to your discretion. However, we have yet to have any notable complications when the staff was told that the patient was a surrogate mother. Sometimes this assists the staff in handling your case more appropriately and with more sensitivity.

2. During your time in the hospital, please feel free to let the nursing staff know your needs and how you would like situations handled. More than likely, your nurses will never have met a surrogate before and therefore it would be helpful for them to know what you would like and when.

3. If there are any questions or concerns, the hospital social worker and or the OB charge nurse should be contacted. These two positions will have already been notified of the circumstances and are often most helpful in answering any of your questions.

4. The Birth Clerk at the hospital will request you to provide the necessary information for the birth certificate. If you are in the artificial insemination program, make sure that you have the natural father’s information available. You need the father’s full legal name, date and place of birth. In the case of In-Vitro Fertilization arrangement, it may be advisable to also have the biological parent’s information handy in the event that you are requested to provide the information for the birth record.

5. Before checking out of the hospital, you will need to help in filling out the birth certificate and may need to sign a release form called an AD-22. The couple will provide the necessary information regarding these at the hospital or prior to the birth. The AD-22 form gives the couple permission to take the child home from the hospital. Feel free to ask for these papers so that your checking out is not delayed.

6. You may want to give some thought prior to the birth as to how you would like to say “Good-bye” to the couple and the child. Surrogates vary a great deal in how much contact they want to have with the couple and the child in the hospital. However, most surrogate mothers have reported that they do prefer the opportunity to say “good-bye” to the couple and the child in a formal way and to wish them well. It is important that you have the time you need for this. Do not be shy about this issue. Feel free to discuss this with your fellow surrogates and your counselor as to what you feel would be the most personally satisfying way to handle this special period of time.

I hope this helps someone. My agency just emailed this to me and thought this would be a perfect place to share.

Thanks for posting!!

Great suggestions! I'm hearing that hospitals now days are much more familiar with surrogacy then when I was having my c-section. Hope all goes well with the rest of your pregnancy. Keep us updated!!

I'm hearing the same. It seems like people know more about surrogacy over the past few years. Probably all the celebs since my pregnancy, Elton John, Nicole Kidman. Hope everything goes great with your pregnancy!

great tips!

Good to know! I can't wait until I'm to this point.. and to see the couple's eyes light up when I hand over their bundle of joy! I'm so excited!!!