I was wondering how to start if you are going to be a surrogate for IP but independently? How does the whole process go about? I know with the agencies you have lawyers and all that and the agencies does everything? So how and what do you all do before starting the process?

Hi Angie, the best way to go independent is finding someone either you know who is in need of a surrogate, or finding someone on the internet on a board like this one. You will still probably need a lawyer/contract, but sometimes IPs prefer independent because it can cost extra to pay an agency to find a surrogate for you. Other times, they feel more comfortable going through an agency since the surrogate is more closely screened, etc... To start the process first you will probably want to figure out your answers to questions like:

Reason for wanting to be a surrogate

Medical History especially related to pregnancy or heredity

Drugs/Alcohol/Tobacco use

Type of relationship you would like with the intended parents before/during/after

What your expectations are for the delivery, ie: drug free/some drugs/pain free and how would she feel about a c-section

Feelings about abortion/reduction, ie:would you and if so under what circumstances

If doing GS number of babies willing to carry

Do you have support of spouse/partner/family

Your fee and any other expenses she expects you to provide, ie: lost wages,
travel, childcare, paid household help, maternity clothes, life
insurance (how much)

Do you have medical insurance to cover any of this

These are all questions IPs are going to want to know. Next I'd post an ad on this board and any other surrogate board on the internet. (You can also add this on your profile page on here).

You can also look for IPs that you're interested in on classifieds on this and other boards.. Then contact an IP that YOU are interested in. Usually an IP already has in mind which RE that they'd like to use, may already have a lawyer (you can get your own or use theirs for the contract). Most REs offices help with the rest of the steps as far as IVF, etc. and what to do from there.

Hope this helps! Good luck!

Do you already have IPs that you met independently or were you asking how to find IPs independently?

If you already have IPs, I'd suggest a contract first. Then I'd set up a meeting with an RE. Our RE (Dr. Saleh on the boards) had an awesome team that explained the entire process and helped us all the way through our first trimester after our surrogate was pregnant.

Best of luck to you! Let us know how things are going!!

Yes, I have some interested Ip's but just didnt know if we need sepeate lawyers and aLL that? Well thanks.

you can get seperate lawyers.. it's up to you. What we did was I had a lawyer and my GS and I agreed on the contract and filed it through my lawyer. There were no problems for us just using one..

Hello eveyrone,

Well have a conference call tomorrow? So cross your fingres hopefully everything goes okay. Well I wanted to also know if all agencies do social worker checks on your house or something like that? And if so can you tell me more about it? Well I will keep everything posted?